okay havent been on here in a long while... did you miss me? nah didnt think so! lol anyway...

why is it that one's life can go from an almost unrealistic high to a low which is so low that you don't think you can get back up?  ive never really thought about that until here recently. then when everything is falling apart one acts all sugary sweet and acts as if nothing is wrong. why do we by human nature react this way to inner pain?

hers one of my all time favorite poems:

Langston Hughes - Dream Deferred What happens to a dream deferred? Does it dry up Like a raisin in the sun? Or fester like a sore-- And then run? Does it stink like rotten meat? Or crust and sugar over-- like a syrupy sweet? Maybe it just sags like a heavy load. Or does it explode?

I was told a few days ago to never look back and to never have regrets, but I have to ask this.  If we do not look back on our lives and think about our mistakes, then how are we supposed to learn what is right and wrong?  How are we supposed to know what is exceptable in today's world?

I have always wondered why people tell us to "live and learn" but they also tell us to "never look back".

yeah i know the last one is kinda random but oh well

halls won! halls:17 west:3

i hung out with jake all night that was fun

hes pretty darn awesome

i think i have a softball game at like 930 in the morning!! thats too crazy

oh well i think we'll win.

night kids!

"Everything would be different if..."

i hate when i get to thinking about this phrase.  all it can lead to is depression and reget.  so i thought i'd share it with you.

we will dance upon days time has forgotten...

i saw this somewhere i cant really remember but i thought it was deep...

     yeah the truth is...

                                    i miss you....

"Ocean Breathes Salty"

Your body may be gone, I'm gonna carry you in.
In my head, in my heart, in my soul.
And maybe we'll get lucky and we'll both live again.
Well I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Don't think so.

Well that is that and this is this.
You tell me what you want and I'll tell you what you get.
You get away from me. You get away from me.
Collected my belongings and I left the jail.
Well thanks for the time, I needed to think a spell.
I had to think awhile. I had to think awhile.

The ocean breathes salty, won't you carry it in?
In your head, in your mouth, in your soul.
And maybe we'll get lucky and we'll both grow old.
Well I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I hope so.

Well that is that and this is this.
You tell me what you want and I'll tell you what you get.
You get away from me. You get away from me.
Collected my belongings and I left the jail.
Well thanks for the time, I needed to think a spell.
I had to think awhile. I had to think awhile.

Well that is that and this is this.
Will you tell me what you saw and I'll tell you what you missed,
when the ocean met the sky.
You missed when time and life shook hands and said goodbye.
When the earth folded in on itself.
And said "Good luck, for your sake I hope heaven and hell
are really there, but I wouldn't hold my breath."
You wasted life, why wouldn't you waste death?
You wasted life, why wouldn't you waste death?

The ocean breathes salty, won't you carry it in?
In your head, in your mouth, in your soul.
The more we move ahead the more we're stuck in rewind.
Well I don't mind. I don't mind. How the hell could I mind?

Well that is that and this is this.
You tell me what you want and I'll tell you what you get.
You get away from me. You get away from me.

Well that is that and this is this.
Will you tell me what you saw and I'll tell you what you missed,
when the ocean met the sky.
You wasted life, why wouldn't you waste the afterlife?

--modest mouse

i dont know why but i love this song.

smiles lead to love and all love ends in pain im sick of the hurt so im sealing my lips and protecting my heart